| 1. "Like" filter. This is absolutely essential.
What this means is "So like this guy like doesn't get anything it's like he has some kind of like
denial chip like implanted in his brain" can be quickly interpreted as "This guy doesn't understand
anything because he's in denial." |
| 2. High pitched squealing or shrieking.
This enables the identification of Banshees from great distances. |
| 3. High pitch tolerance. V. important, otherwise
five minutes of exposure (or a 90-minute road trip to San Diego) will make your ears bleed! |
| 4. Cable TV. This may appear an elitist qualification, but
Banshees enjoy watching low budget "Canadian" shows and movies found on the channels beyond 25. |
| 5. Multi-tasking skills. Ability to watch TV and carry on a
conversation in vivo or over the phone simultaneously. This task is easier than appears as conversations are
usually about TV being watched. |
| 6. ADD. Not the actual DSM-IV diagnosis of Attention Deficit
Hyperactivity Disorder, but the ability to follow random trains of thought and make the associated connections. |
| 7. Lung capacity. Banshees must be able to run a 6-minute mile.
Riiiight. But a good set of pipes is necessary for five minute rants about absolutely nothing, like "Kim Tar rated F" |
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